ive been told by my friend conor that i should write a book about my life one day,and i probably should. im not going to write out all the little dramas that happen to me on this but i will write the one thats had the most impact on me and my character.

about 3 years ago i moved school, i had to. the people in my old year had all turned on me for a reason i gave up trying to understand a looong time ago. when i moved i blamed myself for everything. it was my fault,i had to change,a new me. people wouldnt like the old me. i had lost control over my life completely so i decided to completely recreate my new one. this is when i started to count calories constantly and exercise every day. i had time for all this, i hadnt made any news friends and the ones i sat with i wasnt going to let in as easy as id let the people in my old school. i eat slept and breathed weight loss and fitness. its all i thought about. after a few months my parents realized their usually chubby daughter had completely slimmed down and they sent me to a dietician. over the next year i was sent from dietician to therapist to another therapist. all this time losing more weight. and fights at home over it got worse and worse. 

within a year of moving to my new school i had lost more than two stone. i was severely underweight,had no boobs or shape and my period had left only two months into this faze. i always think of what i hard time i put my two younger sisters through,the fights and screaming and watching me waste away and stop talking and laughing like i used to.i went through a stage of making myself sick and binging for a while aswell. id smuggle food into my pockets and throw it down the toilet so my parents wouldnt know how little i had actually eaten. but after a few months with the same therapist i started to understand what triggered my different actions and why everything had happened. i was able to stop myself from controlling everything as much now. 

its a year and a half on from when i reached a goal weight and left the therapy and im still the same weight. i exercise more and more every week and eat really healthy most of the time. my periods came back two weeks ago (YAY).

even though what i went through was hell i wouldnt change it. its made me a better stronger person. a better friend,sister,daughter,cousin. 

this is only an outlline of the story but its im finished now.

^me now.

if you look at my dad in the background,his face says everything about how worried the whole house was at this time